Monday, May 18, 2009

Deaths, Funeralizing And Daddy...


If you all have read my blog for any time at all, you know several things about me, among which is the fact that I don't deal well with death and I am somewhat irreverent. That being said... besides Butch passing, when I called my little brother I found out that my sister in law's best friend's brother died suddenly that same morning and then my sister called me a couple of hours after I had talked to her about Carol and Butch to tell me that one of our cousins in Arkansas had passed away on Saturday, also. She had been in a nursing home for several years and had been pretty bad off from what the cousin that called my sis had said.

I told Sue, my sister, that I guess the good Lord had gone green along with so many of us, that he was taking 'em to heaven by the bus load. My sweet Baptist sister got a good laugh out of that and said it sure seemed like it. I asked her if it was the full moon or what... she, being a nurse, knew exactly what I was talking about, because it seems things happen on the full moon and the new moon. I told her that I didn't think I wanted to answer the phone any more that day.

Then we got to talking about when we'd get a call from Tennessee that some of daddy's sisters or some of the other kin had died, our daddy would always go get the oil changed in the car and check the air pressure in the tires. And always before we left on the trip back to bury whichever one had gone to see Jesus, daddy took a bath, whether it was Saturday or not.

Our dad was from the older generation that took a bath on Saturday, whether you needed it or not, unless you had to go on a trip... then you took a bath before you left the house. Fortunately, he worked inside, bookkeeping, rather than being an outside laborer. I don't ever recall him being sweaty smelling. He'd get outside at home and mow the lawn and pull weeds and johnson grass out of the lawn, and when he was younger, he'd trim the hedges, but mostly he spent his time indoors.

I just thought I'd share this little tidbit with you all, because my brothers, my sister and our cousin have all had a good time talking about these idiosyncrisities the last few days, and I don't want to continue with all this funeralizing talk. We just try to talk about all the good memories and give each other lots of hugs and support.

After all, that is what family is all about...

16 comments:

darsden said...

Wow Helen, hate to hear about the others having and dealing too. Man it does seam to rain then it pours. Deepest Sympathy my friend to you and your family.

Love the stories though of your family and growing up. Really cool old picture too.

hetty said...

It's good to have memories. They are what get us through the nasty times. Thanks for sharing. I love the photo!

Debbie Jean said...

Wow, Helen, so sorry!! That's a lot for sure. Your family is in my prayers!! Love your stories and pics!

God Bless~
Debbie Jean

Twisted Fencepost said...

Sorry to hear about all that. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers.
And yes, that is what family is all about!
Don't dwell on the fact that they are gone. Remember the good times.
And you know, it comes in threes. You should be done for a while.

Robynn's Ravings said...

Nearly every funeral I've been to is also a time to reconnect with people you rarely see. I hope when I die that's what it is for lots of folks who know me. I hope they have a great time. As far as I'm concerned there would be no better way to honor me then to talk over funny things and old times. I'll be inviting you so you can get the party going!

K. T. Sparks said...

We are alike in lots of ways...I don't deal with death either...it is a horrible affliction to have because it hurts for so long! You know me, (and you) don't ever get over loosing our precious dogs to the grave.....much less people. Well Helen....we are just gals with big hearts is all I gotta say!

Alice said...

Oh, my. You have had quite the week...I'm so sorry for all of your losses..but I do love the way you talk about your daddy. What a wonderful picture you paint of him...he sounds like my Pop!

Laura ~Peach~ said...

hugssssss they always come in threes unless its this family then they come in 5's ugggg

Tatersmama said...

I'm sorry to hear of your losses, but it seems the good Lord has given you the right attitude to see it through...:-)

I love the story of your daddy - it reminded me of my own!
When we were kids in the 50's, we only had a bath once a week, on Sunday nights... so we were fresh and clean for the upcoming school week.

Mary Ellen said...

I'm so sorry you've had all this heartache, but I have to say that I admire your strength. It may sound odd, but I remember the funerals in my family as bittersweet - we cried, but we also laughed, remembering.

All part of the ties that bind. Sending prayers your way.

jojo said...

Oh Helen, I'm just playing catch-up. I'm so sorry to hear of all the losses you've had lately. I've had the most wicked feeling the past few days and sometimes I just stop in my tracks and burst out crying. It's scaring the hell out of me I tell ya. Love the story about your dad. My dad was also from the family of the saturday evening beths! It's so sweet to look back and remember...take care my friend.

farmlady said...

I think you need to think this "not dealing with death" thing through a bit more, Helen.
You seemed to handle all of these deaths with kindness, humor and love of family. That's all God expects of us; to say goodby and remember each life.
I think you handled each death better than most people. It's better to be remembered with a funny story than sadness and tears.

Pastor Sharon said...

the comfort found in family, and talking about the good times is sometimes the only way to make sense of losses. I am sorry for your losses.

DocSly said...

Helen, each one of us has to deal with death and dying in our own way. Remembering how your dad dealt with it and having fond memories of those we lose is your way of doing it. Nothing irreverant about it! Go into your garden and celebrate the new life there.

GingerJar said...

Good memories...sorry about the deaths in your family, they make you sad...but at the same time bring up good memories...right? I have a simular picture to the one you posted....it's of my mom's dad (my grandpa) and my daddy changing the tire on an old truck grandpa had. It is the only picture I have that my daddy and grandpa Williamson shared the same inches of Black and White...since they detested each other. I actually treasure that little black and white and I have it in the cutest little antique frame.

Karen (KayKay) said...

What a hard week! I love your comment about God going green. That sounds like something we might say around here. Sometimes irreverence is what gets you through. God bless.