Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Let's Just Talk...

I've referenced fighting depression but haven't said much about anything else that's been going on with me...mostly because I don't want to come off as a whiney butt. I've also been having physical issues as well as mental and it was something I thought would be a easy fix... a gall bladder. They did every test known to man, woman, or large dog and have decided that my gall bladder still works so now the hunt begins with the liver... since the liver enzymes were up and the gall bladder was working okay it wasn't the cause of the liver enzymes being up.

So Friday I will do blood work for the internist that I see on Tuesday, the 5th, to see if the enzymes are dropping back towards normal, staying static, or hopefully not risen even higher. If they are higher the doctor is going to want to do a liver biopsy. That is scary to me because of family history. My favorite aunt died of alcoholism and my Bro is an alcoholic although he has been dry for 17 years now. Yea, Bro!!!

I'm just blocking all this out of my mind or else I will make myself crazy with worry and that does no good. So now you know the back story to my wanting to just duck and cover. I do that when I worry...even when I'm trying not to worry. It's just if my liver is messed up I don't know what that entails. No one in my family, with the exception of my aunt ever had any liver problems and she lived in California so I wasn't around to see her deterioration and the whole thought of things unknown scare me.

I will keep you all posted. This is about as much as I've bared my soul to anyone or admitted that I'm somewhat nervous and afraid. I see the doctor next Tuesday so you all can think about this right along with me until then.

I will have another post in the next day or two because I spotted a baby cucumber that I need to take photos of for the farm report.


jojo said...

I know that we have been very frank with each other in regards to our battles with depression, when you add other physical problems to the mix it only makes the situation more worrisome. You, I carry close to my hear and send my prayers and wishes for healthy test results. take care friend and know that I am here if you need to talk, or rant...love you.

Sara said...

My prayers and good thoughts for a return to good health!

Lonicera said...

The fact that you're sick with worry had come over in your posts - if for no other reason than what looked like a careful avoidance of any negative issues. Whatever is wrong with you, remember that clinical kowledge has come a very long way in the last generation, and in leaps and bounds in the last five years - I hear about it all the time in my job. And you live in the most powerful and technologically advanced country in the world, where the funds available for research are plentiful. Whatever's wrong with you, you're in the right place to have it.
I've also noticed how much your blogger friends care about you - and you can include me in there too.
Now get out there and nuke those cukes and let's see the result!

BUSH BABE said...

Oh gosh Helen... that really sucks. I suspect that these two issues would really exponentially affect the other, you poor thing.

Lonicera is right - make those doctors work hard for you, to sort this out. The knowledge is there...

Ness said...

Another one of those card carrying members of the Depression Society. Today is unreal. Just want to do what I have to do and go crawl into bed. I will keep you in my prayers that the liver enzymes settle down and all is well. I'm always an email away at dachsielvr@aol.com if you wanna talk. Love you.

Paxie said...

Well hell. I missed this, but I'm glad I can pray even harder (always have you in my prayers) for good news about your liver.

These mental crappy things are a bitch to deal with and I'm right here with you. Not so much depression but this pesky pukey panic disorder.

I know having the garden is helping some, but some good news regarding your liver will be fabulous.

My Mom was a bender alcoholic and my brother is one too. I quit a long time ago, but not for that reason.

I've never heard of liver problems being hereditary so we're going to assume it's something else okay? ((hugs)) like not enough of some minerals or vitametavegimens :)

farmlady said...

Dear Helen,
I almost missed this post too because I was gone.
This is a problem that plagues so many people in our society but when you add physical problems, too, it is even more insidious.
My sister and a good friend both suffer from depression and it's a hard row to hoe. Meds really help.

Take care of yourself and know that you have folks out here that care about you. Prayers are being said and I hope that all will go just fine with the tests.
I love ya, you old Red Dirt women. You're a good person.

Pastor Sharon said...

Hi there! I just wanted to let you know I am sending big hugs your way.

I know baring your soul this way took a lot! I am saying prayers for you!

Hugs and love,

Roslyn said...

Saying a prayer for your good health Helen.

Institute for Internet Safety said...

Don't loss hope for in God nothing is impossible. Just continue praying and always believe that there is God. Thanks for sharing.