An Indelicate Question....

Where, oh where, please tell me does it all come from? I thought I was going to be able to head it off at the pass but it snuck up on me from behind...

Sinus infection that went into bronchitis. Someone turned on the faucets in my nose. When the cedars start blooming, along with the other trees that spring forth in the spring around Oklahoma, I'm always taking preventative measures to avoid going into full blown bronchitis and had been doing a pretty good job until Friday. Then I was slammed. I woke up with a jello head and a voice that was not my own... a gravelly, crud laden, slowed version of my normal speech.

Yep, the dreaded sinus infection from spring blooming things, especially red cedar. By Saturday the coughing had kicked in, I was wiped out just getting from the bedroom to the living room to eat and mess on the computer for a bit before crashing back into the bed for a nap and starting the routine all over again.

On Monday, instead of going to meet a blogging buddy that I've never met... I was running fever and looking so bad that a neighbor stopped by for a visit looked at me and said, Helen, you look sick... Good observation! Laura, my apologies darlin' but you wouldn't have wanted me to come and possibly share this with you to take back to the babies. And I felt so bad that I couldn't find the phone book so's I could call you and apologize like a normal, sane person would do, but I was neither normal or sane because I told Carol to just shoot me and tell God I died. She just looked at me and said, "Don't you think you ought to call your doctor?"

I did and I was able to get in the next morning, Tuesday. I told him what was going on and about being so wiped out even before I got sick. I said it felt like the air I was breathing wasn't being assimilated into oxygen for my body. I'm pretty much wiped out if I do the least thing and I'm really good at doing the least thing... So he ordered chest Xrays and blood work, wrote me 3 prescriptions, one of which was not covered by insurance and cost me $70 dollars, thank you very much, and I went next door to the hospital and got all that stuff done and went home and fell in the bed and slept, more like crashed, for four hours, just from being out of bed for four hours doing doctor and testing stuff. I have nothing in my tank right now to bounce back with and haven't for about a month.

The doctor was true to his word and called me yesterday with test results... my chest xray was good and all my labs were good... except for my liver enzymes with one being particularly high and he asked if I still have my gall bladder. Yep, I do and had had a couple of attacks in the past month. So I'm going in the morning for a gall bladder ultra-sound. I've been through this dance before, twice over the years, but they've never found any stones. So I put up with attacks once or twice a month for probably ten years... HOWEVER... I've never had anything show up in lab work so I will probably end up having gall bladder surgery since it seems to be sending up flares now. Frankly if it helps me to get some energy back it would be worth it. I mean, spring is fast upon us and I'm ready to play in the dirt... if I could only lift a cultivator fork and a shovel to make a new veggie bed.

Okay, my indelicate question... where in the world does all the snot come from... I have blown, literally, through 2 boxes of Kleenex and how can you lose half your body weight in snot and not have it show on the scales... Oops, that's two indelicate questions. How can we produce that much liquid out of our nose and throat in that short of time? That's three... I better quit now.

***** LATE BREAKING NEWS FLASH*****

BFE, OK (RDW wirestory)--- Contrary to popular beliefs, doctors did confirm today that Helen G., a.k.a. Reddirt Woman, has not had any contact with, or been wallowing around with any swine... at least not the 4 legged kind. Although the Dirty Ole' Woman looks like she's been drug around the pasture a time or 7 and although she still feels like she has been wallowed on, over, under and any ways else she could have been wallowed on... that it is not the fault of any old boar... or swine, period.

When this reporter got as up close and personal as the wind would allow to ask about these findings, after Helen wiped her nose on her sleeve, and croaked... "That's right!!! The doctor said it couldn't be proved that I had been near any swines since I chased piglets last summer on my niece's place. I am vindicated! "


Okay, okay... If I cry about this it makes more snot and that's not good, so I have to laugh. I went to the Doc in a Box today. My throat has been so sore for 2 days I figured I best get checked. I do not have strep. I've had so much drainage that my throat looks kinda like a baboon's backside, but it's not strep. I do have bronchitis, all the drainage is gurgling around in the upper lobes of my lungs, so the doc gave me a RX for antibiotics and said if I wasn't better in ten days, to check back. I didn't tell her I wasn't gonna wait ten days. I've been sicker than I can remember in, oh, 30 - 40 years and I better get to feeling better soon or I'll be ready to be rolled off into the bar ditch.

So I have taken heed of the urgings of all of you (thank you, very much) and gone back to the doctor and re-visited what was going on with me and hopefully I'll start going the other way with this stuff, because it really is a bitch to try to be funny about this crud.

Back to bed now, to sleep, perchance to dream, a dream of being swooped up on a magnificent black stallion by a magnificent, young, handsome gorgeous strong person.....
>
>
>
>
>
>
who will finish planting my garden for me before fall...


I really don't think that is too much to ask.